Sex Toys: What’s The Fuzz Around Them?
From hearing about sex toys in the famous TV series Sex and the City to actually wanting to try the vibrator after a sensational video of Kiara Advani in Lust Stories — it’s been quite a ride for exploring beyond the traditional stimulation of the clitoris with fingers.
A survey conducted by ThatsPersonal.com reported about 65% increased sales of sex toys during the lockdown! Now you might say, of course! But the concept of sex toys is relevantly new in India. With the first offline store closing in just 2 months, we are far from showcasing our toys on the bedside. Ironically, sex toys are toys that may not be utilized during intercourse at all. These can sometimes act as a replacement for a partner! Additionally, they come in all shapes, sizes, and colors with a guide on using them.
Are Sex Toys Inclusive of all Genders? YES & YES!
Why should only heterosexual people have all the fun? There are multiple options out there for trans folx and genderqueer people as well. They can choose from an array of devices. The following will distinguish sex toys for different genders.
Note: The aim of differentiating the sex toys is to emphasize and help trans folx and/or non-binary individuals to navigate through these toys easier.
While there is a lot of existing stigmas associated with the community, not only with identities but pleasure as a whole aspect. It is important to see sex toys shops becoming slowly inclusive in production. Here is a list of few sex toys but not limited to:
Ohnut, stackable rings
This is specially made for trans womxn to avoid a painful insertion during sexual activity post the affirmation surgery. Stackable rings help to maintain control during the penetration. This is beneficial for individuals’ pleasure than spicing things up as a couple.
This is specifically made for trans folx and acts as a small penis. While not every trans folx goes through surgery, this can be put on the clitoris to avoid dysphoria in trans folx.
Although these are a few examples of some sex toys specially made for folx, there is a combined list by American doctors from the community talking about more toys that are available to explore.
Moreover, these toys can be explored by everyone irrespective of one’s gender. Although the above toys are more focused on a particular group of people. Other sex toys include:
As the name suggests, these are mostly rubbery pads that can be worn on the fingers. They come in different sizes and usually have a ring with them. Finger vibrators replace the traditional movement of the fingers. These are worn on two fingers if the product comes with the ring. Or these can be worn on one finger and can be adjusted according to one’s comfort with the speed.
These rings are meant for people with penises to keep the erection longer during intercourse. They can be worn around the base of the penis and sometimes around the testicles for longer erections. Penis rings benefit those with Erectile Dysfunction (ED).
And the list goes on with a number of different products with the same purpose. The different sizes and shapes are made for suiting everyone’s interests and different pleasure points. Trust me, by the time I wrote this article, I had advertisements from Amazon with different color vibrators on my screens. Although, I can provide you a huge list of sex toys in this compact article. Let’s dive into where you can explore these more and probably even buy some. (Don’t be shy, we all have our temptations for new gadgets!)
Fantastic sex toys and where to find them
A great question with a follow-up question on where and how? While the how is on you, I can surely guide you through where. Online sex shops for now in India at least are your go-to places. Such shops can help you explore more on different products. These look more or less the same, with some curves that can provide more pleasure. So experimentation and youtube videos are your guides for the best comfort. Importantly, purchasing from our authentic shops is crucial. You don’t need a faulty product for something as important as the orgasm from the busy hustle lifestyle.
Here is a list of 7 websites that one can buy from: (Yes, the names suggest it pretty easily)
After the what, where, who, let’s find out the why?
The ‘why’ here stands for the benefits of experimenting with them – at least once in your life! Sex toys are a form of toys that help both, masturbation and couples to have intercourse creatively. They give you the chance to explore yourself sexually. Moreover, they help in understanding your pleasure points and what gives you comfort and a certain way you like things. (Now that’s a bonus!). In a country like India, the only time one speaks about pleasure is the heterosexual men. Which is either the traditional way of masturbation or the famous ‘he came, I did not’ jokes. Very rare would do we hear stories of the same publicly be spoken by females, trans folx, or the non-binary.
Although just because it isn’t out there, doesn’t mean they do not have their own space. Personally, I only explored my pleasure points when I was intrigued by Sex and the City in 2017. Though not an expert on pleasure points, masturbating till some point gave me some a sense of confidence. I was aware of what I liked, things that I could control, and the need to speak it out loud. Additionally, it helped me in communicating it with my partners and knew exactly what I was looking for.
Sometimes, sex toys help in reaching your pleasure spots even if you aren’t able to. I understand it can be sometimes tough to buy them when you are still living with your parents. (Especially, orthodox ones.) My suggestion? Start with the smaller toys. Those can sometimes be easier to keep in a pocket and used in your own space. Unlike the memes on penis sizes, sex toys as small as a finger vibrator to as large as the motorbunny (used by couples to spice things) do not differ in pleasing our minds out.
Benefits of Using Sex Toys
Sex toys are beneficial for everyone, even those that identify as autosexuals, trans folx, non-binary, and to some spectrum of asexual beings. Using sex toys is also found to be beneficial in those going through menopausal symptoms as they help stimulate the blood flow and trigger a pleasure point. They can also help those who wish to engage in some form of sexual activities with a lack of libido to individuals post-surgery. Additionally, using sex toys helps you sleep better.
Dr. Donaghue, a licensed sex and relationship expert said, “Sex and masturbation can assist with insomnia and restlessness. Since the activity releases oxytocin and endorphins, masturbation can help people feel calm and experience less stress. Both men and women report better sleep after incorporating masturbation into their nighttime routine, and using a sex toy can help you achieve your bedtime orgasm more quickly and effectively.”
If you are still unsure of how sex toys can benefit you personally, my best advice is to do some background research on these products or watching youtube videos that have a set of series on different toys and the benefits listed. There are amazing articles by Cosmopolitan and Bustle that you should explore. This article was a mini-guide for diving into sex toys and an overview of the need to talk about them.
If this article helped you even a bit, don’t forget to explore the above websites and share this article. We hope you stay safe and have many orgasms amidst the pandemic. Let no disability, society, or anyone for that matter stop you from your right to orgasm. (yes, you!)
Pro tip: Remember, ‘skin-safe products made from silicone, toughened glass, metal or ABS plastic, as some are made from materials that may be detrimental to sexual health.
Graphic design by: Avni Gupta on Behance
Read more by the author: Nikita Ghodke, Author at Pratisandhi