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Let’s Talk Sex During Menstruation? Painful or Pleasuring?

Nikita Ghodke writes about sexual intercourse during periods. 

Sex during mensturation? How? Messy?

Sex and menstruation are two topics that are never quite discussed altogether. Sex during menstruation is often considered ‘messy,’ ‘dirty,’ ‘dangerous,’ and so on. These preconceived opinions are archaic ideas. From ‘How can anyone want to have sex with me during periods’ to religious ideologies of ‘impurity.’ To burst the big bubble, sex during menstruation is helpful for the majority of the womxn. Females have experienced increased arousal during this time. There is anecdotal research that says sex can ease period cramps and pain.

Sex during periods 101

Before we dive into the topic of sex during periods. Let’s plunge into what our understanding of sex is. Sexual intercourse isn’t the only way of having sex. Outercourse or non-penetrative sex is another pleasuring and satisfying way of having sex. When we talk about womxn and sexual pleasure, these are topics never on top of the table. Additionally, homophobic understanding of sex has made it harder to look beyond binaries. While some womxn enjoy penetrative-sex some enjoy outercourse. Terminologies used to define such experiences have halted many from experiencing things. Outercourse includes all from massaging, touching, and, of course, clit play. Note that the menstrual period occurs once a month but can differ for each womxn.

Sex during periods differs on how couples look at it, their comfort, and consent on this. While some couples prefer shower sex especially while menstruating, some enjoy getting messy. There is no right answer on how one can. It’s an experiment and it differs couples wise. An article by helloclue suggested, “You can also keep tissues nearby. In case you need to clean up any menstrual blood on you or your partner’s body.”

Research says the chances of getting pregnant is between zero to five percent. These statistics differ with each one’s body and are only observed for the initial days of periods. Though why take a chance? Always better to have protected sex. Condoms not only avoid unplanned pregnancy. They also avoid the high chances of sexually transmitted infections. Which are observed to be higher especially when one is on periods. Non-penetrative can be on the list when your partner is on periods. Mutual masturbation, use of sex toys can be a few that you can experiment with. An article on Bustle,  Levine said “Think about sex being a small part of SEXuality. “Communication is knowing what you like. It can through solo sex, experimenting with sex toys, G-spot stimulation, etc. Taking care of your sexual health are a few of many ‘out of the box’ options.”

What are the benefits of having sex?

Experimenting is the key to knowing what you and your partner will enjoy. It’s natural to release different fluids during intercourse. We observe fluids during sex like sweat, arousal fluid, etc, so let’s try to normalize menstrual blood too. An article by Health.com, Christine Greves, MD, ob-gyn said, “There are actually quite a few pluses to keep in mind when it comes to having sex while you’re menstruating. For one, you may experience less painful periods, if you have sex during them”. She added, “Period cramps happen as a result of the uterus contracting to shed its lining during the cycle. When you have an orgasm, the muscles in your uterus contract, too. When they inevitably release, it can feel better down there. At the same time, having an orgasm triggers the release of endorphins and these help with the pain.”

Dr.Tara Ford, a physician said, “Some [people] report they feel more aroused. While some feel more sensitive around this time. Your flow can serve as extra lubrication during sex, which can also increase pleasure. If you use a store-bought lubricant to help with dryness during sex, this may be your week to go natural.”

“While having sex on your period might help in the lubrication department. That’s only helpful if you haven’t used a tampon in a while. If you end up removing a tampon right before sex. There’s a possibility it already soaked up some of your natural lubrication and dried you out. “You may need some extra lubrication,” Dr. Greves said in an article.

Here is a response from a college student who has had sex during her periods. She said, “It feels a little different from usual sex, and it’s messier. My sex drive is a little higher before and during periods. So I’m more into it. My periods are extremely painful. So sex during periods actually helps me relieve my cramps. It makes me feel so much lighter.”

Another student said, “It feels good to have sex especially during periods. It reduced my pain from cramps to a greater level. There is this rumor that sex during period is painful or gross. In reality, it’s the opposite of it. A plus point for me is that my partner is open about it. He did not panic or gross-out seeing menstrual blood.”

Being open to understanding that sex during menstruation is normal. Note, it’s a two-way process. Communication with your partner about this beforehand is important. Everyone isn’t into having sex during this time. It becomes necessary to communicate. If your periods start while having sex, talk about your plan ahead instead of diving into it. Try to be creative, experimental, and importantly be mindful of the experience.

 “My experience as a guy was different. It felt warm. I didn’t feel disgusted as it’s a natural process. Plus keeping in mind that this was also helping my partner in some way was a good thing.”

While most couples answered a firm no to having any such prior experience. Some added, “I did not even think of this until you asked this very question. As a female, I always thought having sex was itself a taboo. To add to that sex during periods? Would never have crossed my mind. Though I would not be the only one to decide. It’s important to be open about these things with your partner.”

Featured Image Credits: Cosmopolitan.com

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1 thought on “Let’s Talk Sex During Menstruation? Painful or Pleasuring?”

  1. Loved this article a lot! So informative and well written! Also broke the tabooos on so many areas-menstruation, sex, female pleasure, sex other than and beyond PIV, so much more! Kudos to you!

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