Sex Positivity In Parenting : A Guide To Sex Positive Conversations
Sex positivity in parenting is all about the responsibility of every parent to let their children know that sexuality is a normal, healthy and natural part of life.
Sex forms a vital part of everyone’s life. Hence, the topic of sex will come up at certain point of time before your children. A huge difference exists between being a sex positive parent and going too far. Sex positivity in parenting is all about teaching your children that sexuality is normal, healthy and natural part of life and there’s nothing shameful about it. These conversations might be awkward and uncomfortable at first, but these small series of open conversations go a long way in normalizing the topic of sex, sexual health and sexuality for children as they grow up.
Let’s discuss what every parent should know about on how to be a sex positive parent.
Have a positive image of your own body
Treat your own body with love and respect, and that’s what your children will pick up from you. If you nag and complain about your physical features and feel bad about your own body, your child will hear this too and imbibe the same. Be more respectful of your own body, accept and love it for the way it is.
Kiss and hug your partners in front of your kids
Many kids who never saw their parents ever kiss or be affectionate with each other grow up and feel like they had no mirroring about what it means to be in a loving affectionate relationship. Therapists suggest that being sexual is an essential and amazing part of being human and it’s okay to let your child know that.
Use the right words for body parts
A lot of parents tend to use made up words while addressing the private parts to their kids. It is absolutely essential to use the proper names to address these private parts so that your child doesn’t feel like those parts are something to be ashamed of. Children should not grow up to be confused or ashamed of their own body parts.
Children are quite often forced to hug or kiss relatives even against their will. This is a strict no-no. Instead, you should teach your children to speak in case they are uncomfortable. Moreover, they should also be taught to ask first when touching a person. This helps in instilling an understanding about consent in the child from a very young age.
Tell your kids that it’s fine to be sexual
Let your kid know that it’s fine to be sexual and have sexual feelings. You should teach your kids about consent, boundaries, hygiene, protection, expectations and also that they have the charge of their bodies. This includes your behavior with your child when you spot them touching themselves. Tell them that touching may feel good, however, they should do it in a private place (such as in the bathroom or bedroom).
Never avoid the subject
Whenever you avoid the subject, you’re instilling in them a sense of shame. Kids need connection, modelling and mirroring when it comes to the topic of sex.
These uninhibited and open conversations with children help them be more confident about their own bodies, help them open up and gain more knowledge about the topic of sex instead of being ashamed of it. Normalizing the usage of proper biological terms for body parts, removing the shame from the entire topic of genitalia, teaching the true meaning of consent and conventionalizing discussions of sexual health and sex expands the knowledge of your kids much more than just one “sex talk” conversation would. This series of ongoing conversations makes your child see these topics in a completely different light.
What are your thoughts on the ways to educate children about positive self image and sex health? Let us know in the comments below!